I wrote a poem once. I know! I even surprised myself there. It came about when I belonged to a lovely local writing group and we set ourselves a weekly task of writing a piece of prose or poetry based upon a single randomly selected word. One of us would close our eyes, open the dictionary, run a finger down the page and stop – and that word would be the inspiration for our writing homework that week.
I loved those exercises. I was writing short stories at the time and I loved the challenge of writing a piece for the next week’s lesson that the group would critique and comment on. Some of those stories I then went on to place with the women’s magazines which was a lovely feeling.
One particular week, the word chosen was ‘bondage’ and I was stumped as to how I might work this into a story. I knew I didn’t want to write an erotic story and the ideas just weren’t flowing. I left it right until the last moment and in desperation wrote this little ode. Later, with the encouragement of the group, I sent it off to one of the writing magazines, where it won a small prize.
They said something along the lines of ‘while it didn’t fit the traditional structures of poetry (I had no idea about scanning etc) it made them laugh.’ I’m still hoping it made them laugh for the right reasons!
I’m looking rather fetching
I think you will agree
This little two-piece number
Looks great in PVC.
I tried it in the leather,
In red, with matching mask
But squeezing all my bits in
Proved too much of a task.
I think I’m almost ready
Stilettos fastened tight
This lipstick looks alluring
In the soft glow of the night.
So tell me where you want me
Spread-eagled on the bed?
Or should I fetch the dog lead?
I’d relish being led!
Thrash me with your slippers, love
The sofa here will do
But mind my little sore spots
You know I have a few.
Clasp my wrists with handcuffs
Wrap me up in chains
Whatever you desire
I’d gleefully arrange.
You’re looking rather pale, dear
Is it something that I’ve said?
I’ll fetch a paracetamol
To soothe your pounding head.
Why not go to bed now?
I can see you’re feeling rough
I’ll make a mug of cocoa
Would you like a lemon puff?
I wonder what’s the matter?
Was it something that you ate?
You’ll soon be feeling better
We can fix another date.
I’ll put away the gear now
It’s a shame to spoil the fun
But I want you back on top form
For our night of passion, hun!